


As Raindrops Fall

by MizErie



Series: Male Order Frank [3]
Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Past Abuse, Thunder and Lightning, Thunderstorms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-07
Updated: 2019-01-07
Packaged: 2019-10-05 08:53:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17321864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MizErie/pseuds/MizErie
Summary: One stormy evening, a little over a year after their marriage, Frank opens up to Gerard about his past abuse. Gerard's heart breaks for Frank, and Gerard attempts to pick up Frank’s pieces and make him whole again.(While it's helpful, it's not necessary to have read the first two stories in this series to understand this one.)





	As Raindrops Fall

**Author's Note:**

> I needed to write this. Not just for the boy Frank, but for myself. Hopefully as you read it, you'll find that you needed it too.
> 
> If you're here looking for my usual smut, you won't find it. This is the first piece I've ever written that doesn't have a sex scene in it. I'm completely okay with that. 
> 
> Disclaimer: I am in no way affiliated with My Chemical Romance or the guys that make up the band. No part of this is true; it is purely a fictional story. Any part of this story that resembles real life is only coincidental. No parts of this story may be reproduced or used without permission.

A ferocious wind howls outside their home, and Gerard snuggles an anxious Frank closer to him on the sofa. A sudden crack of thunder causes Frank to jerk.

“Shh, it's just a thunderstorm,” Gerard reassures him.

“I know,” Frank mutters. “But the sound of the wind and then the thunder, it just reminds me of something horrible.”

Frank clings to Gerard's arm wrapped around him as Gerard hides a kiss in Frank’s shaggy hair.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Gerard asks, careful not to make Frank feel pressured.

“I don't know,” the smaller man whimpers.

Another clap of thunder and Frank jumps again. Gerard runs his hand across Frank's back, his soft fingers tracing the outlines of the scars there.

“Does it have anything to do with these?” Gerard’s tone is soothing, comforting.

“Everything.”

Frank twists Gerard's wedding band around Gerard’s ring finger, a nervous habit he's picked up in the year they've been married, as he stares out the living room window into the dark of night.

“I can't imagine the things you've lived through to leave marks like this,” Gerard states sympathetically. “It's probably more than I care to think about.”

Frank braces when he sees a flash of lightning, not wanting to once again wince at the thunder certain to follow.

“They used to beat us with wooden canes and cat o’ nine tails when we broke rules. You'd hear it before you felt it,” Frank rambles without thought.

“That's horrible, Frankie. How many times did they punish you like that?”

“What, on the X?”

Frank sighs and nuzzles the side of his face into the comfort of Gerard's warm chest. Gerard combs his fingers through Frank's hair while Frank thinks.

“I honestly can't give you a number. I lost count a long time ago,” he finally answers.

“What's ‘the X’?” Gerard asks, his curiosity about Frank's past getting the better of him.

“It's a large, wooden cross that forms an X. We were stripped naked and shackled to it before every beating.” Frank's indifferent manner as he speaks tells Gerard just how commonplace these punishments were.

“I'm so sorry they did that to you, Frankie.”

“The worst was when they would hit my lower back with the canes,” Frank goes on, unable to stop talking now that he's opening up. “My legs would go numb and give out, and I could hardly breathe hanging there. The strain on my chest muscles made it impossible to take a deep breath.”

“And this thunderstorm reminds you of those X punishments,” Gerard states, putting it all together.

“Between the wind and the sudden cracks of thunder, I keep expecting my back to explode in unbearable pain.”

“I don't know what to say,” Gerard replies, sickened by the thought of Frank being assaulted so viciously. “I'm sorry you had to go through that.”

“Devin made it better,” Frank utters mindlessly, lost in the bittersweet memories of Joshua's compound for boys.

“Who's Devin?” Gerard questions softly.

Hearing his former lover’s name from his husband's lips brings Frank back to the present.

“He was one of my teachers. He was also my protector.” Frank pauses, and his face becomes an abashed rose color. “And eventually my lover,” he adds in a quieter voice.

Gerard puts his fingers under Frank's chin and raises his head to look him in the eyes.

“So why didn't he stop them? Why didn't he take you away from all of that?”

“He tried to. It got him killed right in front of me.” Silent tears stream down Frank's cheeks. “I never got to mourn for him.”

“You loved him,” Gerard states almost questioningly.

“As much as was possible in that fucked up situation, I guess.”

Gerard cups Frank's face and runs his thumb over the crest of Frank's cheekbone. He can see the grief in Frank's eyes, feel Frank's need to let it out.

“You can mourn for him now. I don't mind, I swear,” Gerard says earnestly.

Frank lets out a sob as he collapses onto Gerard's chest, but Gerard doesn't shush him. Instead Gerard holds him close and combs his fingers through Frank's hair to comfort him. Gerard's heart bleeds for Frank, and he allows Frank to cry it out for as long as he needs to. Once Frank has calmed down for the most part, Gerard wipes at the tear streaks on Frank's face. Frank takes a deep breath in an effort to compose himself.

“Do you want to talk about him?” Gerard questions delicately.

“Not really,” Frank answers in a tenuous voice. “If you don't mind, I'd rather just keep that to myself.”

“You don't need my permission, Frankie. I understand there are things you don't want to talk about.”

“I know that. It's just, I've been trained to be submissive to my owner,” Frank mumbles.

Gerard curses himself for bringing up his ownership status as Frank reverts to learned behaviors—lowering his head, rolling his shoulders forward, and closing his legs—unaware of doing so. Gerard climbs out from under him, and Frank turns to look at Gerard with wide eyes.

“I’m not your owner, Frankie. I never have been. I don't want you to think of me that way anymore.” Gerard stands up. “I should have done this a long time ago.”

Frank watches Gerard cross the living room and dig through his desk for that familiar manila envelope. Finally locating it under a year's worth of art, right where it was left upon bringing Frank home, Gerard tosses the entire stack of Frank’s ownership papers in the unlit fireplace.

“Understand me well, Frank,” Gerard declares. “You are free. From this day on, no one will ever own you again because no one ever had the right to own you to begin with. You are not, and I repeat, are _not_ a piece of property, but a living, breathing human being with rights.” Gerard points to their framed marriage certificate hung on the wall. “This is the only paper that has ever mattered to me. Not because of the money that came with it, but because I love you.”

With that, Gerard strikes a match and lights the envelope on fire. As Frank watches the papers burn, Gerard snuggles back into his side.

“I beg you, Frankie. Let this be my first and last act as your owner,” Gerard whispers in Frank's ear.

Frank crawls between Gerard's thighs and kisses Gerard with everything he has to give. There's a sudden crack of loud, rumbling thunder, and Frank chokes on a gasp, his spine arching involuntarily. His eyes sting with more tears, so he crushes them shut.

“Come with me,” Gerard says as he takes Frank's hand in his.

Frank slowly looks up at him.

“Where to?” Frank questions, sounding very small.

“To make a new memory, something positive to associate with thunderstorms.”

Frank climbs out of Gerard’s lap and waits for Gerard to get up. Still holding gently to Frank's hand, Gerard leads him to the front door. He opens it and steps onto the porch, but Frank hesitates to follow him. Gerard turns to look at Frank right as a bright streak of lightning banishes the darkness around them for a brief second. Frank eyes widen, and he squeezes Gerard's hand with all his strength. Gerard presses his body against Frank's, mindful of not forcing Frank any farther out of the house, and their lips brush.

“You're with me now. You're safe. I will never let anyone hurt you like that again, ever,” Gerard murmurs to him over the sound of the pounding rain.

Frank's expression softens, and he nods his head. Gerard guides Frank out of the house and into the pouring rain. He lifts Frank's hand up to his shoulder, keeping his fingers wrapped around it, and circles his other arm around Frank’s waist. Together they start moving, dancing to the slow beat of unheard music as the downpour saturates them. With each clap of thunder, Frank drifts further into the safety of Gerard’s very essence.

Frank rests his cheek against Gerard’s, his eyes slipping closed as droplets of water drip off his hair and lashes. In his ear, Gerard hums an unfamiliar tune. Frank listens to the melody when Gerard repeats it, searching his memory for the corresponding lyrics, but he can't come up with anything.

He finally asks, “What's that song you're humming?”

“It's actually something I've been trying to write for you,” Gerard answers.

Frank leans back in Gerard's arm, stalling the dance. He searches Gerard's face.

“Will you sing it for me?”

“The world is ugly, but you're beautiful to me,” Gerard croons without hesitation, picking up the slow rhythm with their bodies. “Are you thinking of me, like I'm thinking of you? I would say I'm sorry...”

Gerard touches his lips to Frank's in a tender kiss, and Frank melts into it, deepening the contact.

“There's an ache in my heart," Gerard continues on singing with his face against Frank's cheek, “and there's a burning in my eyes. We could get a new start, but I'd rather learn not try. We could find a new place, maybe no one knows our name. But I think that's just a phase. So I just wanted you to know, that the world is ugly, but you're beautiful to me.” He sighs in frustration. “I’m sorry. That's all I have so far. I'm not very good with words.”

“I love it. You'll have to finish it for me someday.”

“I'll do my best,” Gerard promises and then begins humming the tune again.

After listening to Gerard for several minutes, Frank shifts to look at him.

“You saved my life twice. You know that, right?” he says solemnly.

Gerard raises an eyebrow at him.

“How did I do that?”

“The man who ran the place, Steven, hated me and was going to let me starve to death until you bought me.”

A thickness rises in Gerard's throat, but he swallows it down.

“And when was the second time?” he asks with an uneven voice.

“When you said you wouldn't send me back. He told me if I was returned again, he'd beat me to death.”

Gerard keeps moving their bodies to the tempo of his love song, unsure of what to say.

“I think you're doing it again right now,” Frank says softly, just loud enough to be heard.

Gerard puts a hand on the back of Frank's head and tucks him into his shoulder, needing to hold him closer. He's grateful for the rain so that Frank doesn't have to watch him cry. So many emotions tear at Gerard's gut as he comes to terms with everything he's learned tonight. Gerard recalls Frank's pathetic appearance the first time he saw him, and he suddenly realizes how much more abuse Frank must have endured to have been that broken. He truly can't fathom anything worse than what he's already heard, but his intuition tells him Frank has suffered through unspeakable atrocities.

Frank burrows his face deeper into the crook of Gerard’s neck. Gerard hasn't noticed until now that they are both shivering uncontrollably from the cold. He pushes Frank away a small distance and kisses his trembling lips.

“Let's go inside and get you warmed up, Frankie,” he says, wiping away some of the water running down Frank's pallid face in vain.

“Just…” Frank begins, shifting his gaze to the dark sky. “One more minute. Please?”

Gerard gives in to Frank's request and nods. He watches as lightning illuminates Frank’s eyes. Frank slips them closed and stands a little taller, lifting his face to the heavens. Right on cue, there's another crack of thunder. Frank doesn't flinch. Instead, a broad smile graces his lips, and he laughs wholeheartedly.

Frank turns his attention back to Gerard, who—despite the numbing temperature—waits patiently for Frank.

“Now we can go in,” Frank states.

They nestle together, desperate for each other's body heat, and climb the steps to the house. Once inside, Gerard quickly gathers an armful of towels from the linen closet as they head for their bedroom. He drapes one around his shoulders before setting about peeling off Frank's drenched clothes and drying the smaller man. Gerard's unsteady hands fumble, and Frank wraps his fingers around Gerard’s wrist.

“I can do this myself, Gee. You should dry yourself off.”

Gerard looks up at him from his knelt down position. Thick strands of his wet hair quiver with his shaking, and Frank brushes them out of Gerard’s face.

“I want to do this for you,” Gerard replies through chattering teeth. “You call it being submissive. I call it being equals.”

“Okay,” Frank breathes.

After getting Frank’s body mostly dry, Gerard stands up and begins toweling off Frank's dark hair. Frank tilts his head back, basking in Gerard's doting treatment. Gerard pulls a set of Frank's flannel pajamas out of the drawer, but Frank takes them from him.

Frank pecks Gerard's lips with a kiss and then tells him in a gentle tone, “I get the message, but I can dress myself. You're as pale as a ghost, and your lips are nearly blue. How about attending to yourself before you end up with hypothermia.”

Gerard nods, though it's hardly distinguishable, and struggles out of the soaked fabric clinging to him. By the time he's dry, Frank has gotten dressed and stands in front of him holding his thickest fleece lounge wear. Frank waits for Gerard to pull on his dry, warm clothes before snuggling up to him.

“Thank you,” Frank murmurs candidly.

Gerard puts a hand on both sides of Frank's face and kisses his forehead before looking him deep in the eyes.

“You don't have to thank me, Frankie. You're my whole world. I will do anything for you.”

One side of Frank's mouth perks in a grin.

“Will you make me coffee? Yours always tastes better than mine.”

Gerard laughs.

“God, yes. I could definitely use some coffee right now,” he says, turning for the bedroom door.

“You always want coffee,” Frank teases as he follows him down the hall.

Minutes later, they are cuddled up on the sofa once again, each with a warm mug in hand. Frank is in his favorite spot, tucked between Gerard's thighs with his head against Gerard's chest. Their intertwined fingers rest on Frank's stomach. Frank calmly watches the storm continue to rage outside the living room window while Gerard simply watches Frank with newfound respect. 

**Author's Note:**

> I can finally put this story to rest. It is complete. The boy Frank is now complete.
> 
> I'll be honest with you. I don't care about hits or kudos or comments on this. If you want to leave feedback, I am eternally grateful for it and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. 
> 
> But I wrote this for myself. I wrote this because I needed absolution for the things I've put Frank through in this series. That absolution came in the form of Gerard acknowledging Frank's past and making him whole again. I am as happy with this story as I can possibly be right now. My only hope is that you found it as comforting as I did.
> 
> On a side note, I am aware I changed some of the lyrics for The World is Ugly live version or whatever the band calls it. But I needed it to fit. (Try to tell me you didn't hear Gerard's pained voice singing it though. *winks*) 
> 
> Thank you for reading! My love to you all!  
> xo Miz


End file.
